Windy Monday

What a windy day, with greeneries around him and looking up at the vast sky, he realises that it's not a clear day today. The sky is not blue, but it's decorated with lots of white and fluffy cottons. The clouds slowly float away, changing the sky scene every now and then.

With a heavy heart, he trudges on, moving slowly but steadily, carrying the hope that he will see rainbow soon. The clouds continue to float away from his view, while he continues to keep going. The wind still continues to blow, but it doesn't blow his troubles away.

Alone among the geenery, he sighs. He tries his best to stay positive, telling himself that things will only get better. All things can't stay inertia all the time. Things that fall will rise again. Likewise, things that go up and one day fall, and may fall real hard. He heard from a wise man the other day: "I was born to live. All living things are born to live, and since I am born to live, I wanna live a happy live. I wanna do what I love doing, and not to follow the norms blindly."

Eminem - Not Afraid

十字路 と私

The clouds and their various formation
Always busy, going about their own work

The trees and their continuous swayings
Are always busy as well, forming various kinds of howlings during storms, and breezes on a quiet day

The forests and their flora and fauna
Are busy growing, forming canopies and protection for the earth

The queen ant and her soldiers
Are also busy finding and ferrying food home

The people in the city
Are busy going about their own work

The people at home
Are also busy with their own affairs

その人生

A Raining Wednesday

Dark, overcast sky was looming even before dawn broke. Loving every bit of a rainy day. Streaks of rain come pouring down, the scene is not as great as that of snow flakes falling from the sky, but one calms down when seeing the rain beating against the trees, the pavements, houses and the window panes. The rain seems to make the discolored trees look even greener, the limping leaves fresher, and the dirty roofs of the houses cleaner, washing away the accumulated dirt.

Didn't work very hard in the morning. Will work hard soon.

あなたを愛する

Quiet Monday, Stormy Tuesday

Monday was slow; no emails, no calls. No communication for a straight 7 hours. The weather was relatively warm, but not too hot and humid. Another Monday of the week had passed. Still no news.

Tuesday came. The sky was already overcasted early in the morning. A huge storm followed and blue skies appeared in the early afternoon. Will there always be sunshine after the rain? Worked really hard in the morning without distraction. Will rewards come eventually? Went back to have a session with Soseki Natsume for an hour. Got distracted and continued to work hard. Tuesday has come and gone. Another week will soon pass. What a life.

Another Overcast Monday

Things are getting slower
Hopes are getting dimmer

Signs are getting weaker
Days are getting shorter

Energy is dwindling
No matter how hard she tries

Unable to control her mental state
She lets herself go with the flow

How long does she have to wait?
Nobody knows

A Tribute to Mrs Lim SL

Just the other day, I heard from a high school friend that my form teacher from 3A and 4A had passed away due to cancer. She was only 15 years our senior. I felt a great tinge of regret and sadness coz I didn't have a chance to thank her personally for the principles and life philosophy that she had incalcuated in me. I missed her every now and then. I owed my good results in my 'O's to her. She piqued my interests in both the Biology and English subjects. She treated us like friends and never in her history as our form teacher during those 2 years had she yelled at us or 'annoyed' us.

She loved to look good and seldom repeated her outfits more than three times. We loved to see her in her different pretty dresses every morning. I recall that in an outing to the beach, her then 4-year old son mistook me as her coz we were both wearing the same hair style. I also recall she asking my closed group of friends why I was such a snob, I didn't say 'hi' nor smile at her when I saw her outside the classroom. My friends explained that I was short-sighted and was unable to recognize people even 50meters away from me. I never had a chance to formally apologize to her for this. I guess it's too late now.

RIP, Mrs Lim.

Dreamland

All sorts of weird dreams appeared; dreams from the distant past and dreams from the recent past. Time ceases to exist the moment one goes to sleep. People sleep when they are tired or when they are bored. Sleeping is a form of escape, escaping from real life, escaping from our thoughts. Our thoughts about the past, the present and the future. We know about the past, the present, but we do not know about the future. Our dreams tell us our past and present, sometimes ridiculous; but they never tell us about our future. How I wish my dreams could tell me about my future, even if it's ridiculously far-fetched.

The Sky Is Overcast

Well, it's Monday again, but it's nearing end of the day. Most people had Monday blues this morning. In another time zone, in another place, the Monday blues will hit people who dread going to work. There is another group of people who does not get Monday blues at all, but what this group of people dread is the absence of human contacts.

Alone in their apartments, some of them do their best to keep themselves occupied; reading, surfing, finding work, occasionally watching TV. Some people choose to go for a walk, some choose to lay in bed and sink deeper into depression. Regardless of what they do, they share the same hope.

"I had come to hate being at home because of a sort of disgust I was feeling for people in general, and once I started felling that way, I couldn't stand the sight of my relatives, my parents, anybody. At one point I realized what I was doing and I tried to fight it, but by then it was too late. The more I struggled, the worse it became, until finally the cork popped and all the reserves of patience I had tried so hard to build were lost. I left home that very night."

Aishiteru, Soseki Natsume

The Girl with a coconut tree growing on her head

Just the other day
When we were together
We saw a little girl
He says "There's a girl with a coconut tree growing on her head!"

That tickled me
That made my feet stand on the ground
Again

That made me take stock of my life
Again

That made me slow down
Again

That made me look back in wonder
What have I done in the last 2 years?

Thank You
All I wanna say is
Thank You

Impermanence

I first met You
About a year and a half ago

We were never close
But the memory of You
Is still etched in my mind

I was extraordinary nice to You
Coz you were years my senior
Coz you commanded my respect
Despite your lackadaisical attitude
Which I discovered the reason behind it
Months later

I heard you on the phone
On that Saturday morning

You sounded well
The next thing I knew
I saw the message that you had passed on
Tears streamed down my cheeks
Naturally

R.I.P
K.W.

December 09

A tiring journey
Colorless, meaningless, and hopeless

What is life?
It's a journey, isn't it?

But it's such a tiring journey
Day after day
Month after month
Year after year

The earth revolves
Seasons change
People change

But nothing changes me
Life is still a tiring journey

1st Nov 2009

It's 1st Nov today. Nothing special, not a special day for me.

What can I blog about? Gundum? Nah. FB? Nah. Anime? Nah. No interest.

Went to the library and was disappointed that no books there interest me at all. I was trying to find books written by Leo Tolstoy, Fyodor Dostoyevsky, or some other Japanese authors, but was unable to find any. There were a couple of books by LEo Tolstoy, but I have already read those.....Hmm...a boring Sunday afternoon.

Will be going to the incredible India for about 10 days. Mumbai, Pune and New Delhi. I am excited about going to Taj Mahal....that's it. Do not fancy Indian food, so not sure how I am going to survive for the next 10 days!

Wish myself luck and more luck, need to look for four-clover leaves in the garden.

Satantango

Survived the 7hours 12 minutes Hungarian film at the National Museum. When it started, I thought it was kindda boring coz the take was extremely long. However, as the film moved on and as the audience further immersed themselves in the movie, the film didn't seem that boring afterall. It was a bleak movie, interspersed with some dark sense of humor occasionally. I could identify some characters with myself, and with the people I know. The movie is so surreal, so much so that I started imagine myself to be one of the characters.

The poor gal, Estika, killed herself and her pet, a cat, by taking rat poison. Why did she do that? Why did she torture the cat before she killed it? And why did she kill herself eventually after the cat died? I have answers to these questions but I guess a child really learns from the adults around her.

Well, 10 days to go...BeBe.....

School Friends

Met a college mate at the Hanoi airport some 3 weeks back. Interestingly, I instantly recognized him when he walked into the lounge. OMG, he didn't change a bit at all. Still looks the same, this guy has not aged at all! It's been 20 years! I wonder if he remembers me as his college mate? I guess he did coz he stole a look at me too...Guess I didn't change much as well except for a few pounds.

Time flies and lots of sweet memories from school days are still fresh in my mind. I hardly bump into schcool friends the last 20 years; maybe not at all. But maybe I did, but it's just that they have changed so much that I can't even recognize their faces now.

Don't Forget to Remember!

Some of these pics are just a stark reminder to buy an external hard disk. Too many pictures not saved from the XD card!

Borobudur - Yogyakarta

Time and tide wait for no man. It's been more than a year when we last visited Angkor Wat. We went to another world heritage site over the long weekend - Borubudar. It didn't leave me with a very great impression. Ironically, it was the Prambanan temple that left an indelible mark on me.

More pics coming up.

In Memory of You

You came,
And left
Without a trace

Was it joy?
Or
Was it sadness?

The hustle
And bustle
of life
Overtook
Your existence

A thousand
Apologies
Will not
Heal

My heart
Bled
When I saw
Pieces of You

R.I.P.

B: Late May 2009
S D: 6th July 09
O D: 7th July 09

LOVE LOVE LOVE／DREAMS COME TRUE

Dedication to AL

The conversation goes like this:-

Anonymous: Hey, AL. How are you today?
AL : Well, pretty ok...

Anonymous: So, what have you been up to?
AL : School work, CCA, more school work...damn busy

Anonymous: Poor gal
AL : Sigh... what to do? I am taking my "O"s this year.

At this time, Anonymous thinks to himself: "AL, you are even busier and more stressed out than a working adult! Adults have more problems, you know. They have to spend most of their time at work, take care of the family, take care of household chores, ensuring that their relationships among their spouses, colleagues, friends, loved ones are maintained. Adults have to take many many things into consideration when making decisions. Some adults are taking part-time classes, so they have exams to tackle as well! Can you imagine, juggling with sooooo... many things at one time!"

So, Anoymous advised AL:-

Anonymous: Hey, AL. Take it easy, man. Learn how to relax and do not get too stressed out. School is just a part of our lives. It is something that most of us, the lucky ones, have to go through in our lives. Many children in the 3rd world countries do not even have a chance to go to school! This is just a phase of our lives..

AL : Ok, ok. I know, I know. I will learn how to relax more and be good to myself!

9th March

Told myself that I have to post something on 9th March.....

in the middle of the flowing seasons,
I suddenly feel the length of the days.
during the days when it is too busy,
you and I sketch out our future.

Placing their love on March's wind,
the sakura buds continue on through spring.

rays of an overflowing light,
little by little, warm up the morning.
After giving a large yawn,
I'm a little shy being by your side

Standing at a new world's entrance,
I now notice that I'm not alone.

If I close my eyes, you are there.
under my eyelids you live.
How strong it could become
As for you and me, I want to be together

The dust carried by a whirlwind,
entwines with the laundry to be done,
Just before noon the white moon in the sky
I was somehow fascinated by how pretty it was.

Although there are times when I can't do it right,
if I look up at the sky, even being that small

The blue sky is sharply clear
the sheeplike clouds quietly sway.
the joy of waiting for flowers to bloom
if it's sharing that with you, that is happiness.

In the future as well gently smile next to me.

If I close my eyes, you are there.
under my eyelids you live.
How strong it could become
As for you and me, I want to be together
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~


流れる季節の真ん中で
ふと日の長さを感じます
せわしく過ぎる日々の中に
私とあなたで夢を描く

3月の風に想いをのせて
桜のつぼみは春へとつづきます

溢れ出す光の粒が
少しずつ朝を暖めます
大きなあくびをした後に
少し照れてるあなたの横で

新たな世界の入口に立ち
気づいたことは 1人じゃないってこと

瞳を閉じれば あなたが
まぶたのうらに いることで
どれほど強くなれたでしょう
あなたにとって私も そうでありたい

砂ぼこり運ぶ つむじ風
洗濯物に絡まりますが
昼前の空の白い月は
なんだかきれいで 見とれました

上手くはいかぬこともあるけれど
天を仰げば それさえ小さくて

青い空は凛と澄んで
羊雲は静かに揺れる
花咲くを待つ喜びを
分かち合えるのであれば それは幸せ

この先も 隣で そっと微笑んで

瞳を閉じれば あなたが
まぶたのうらに いることで
どれほど強くなれたでしょう
あなたにとって私も そうでありたい

Huh?

Damn, most of the videos that I posted online have been taken down due to patent rights. How sad! Those were the songs that I truly love and will remember for the rest of my life..... but I guess I can still find the songs on Youtube, but it's just that those are the videos that I really adore most.....

Well, well.

Finishing the book 'Stalin'. Kindda "admire" this crook though he was ruthless. He was able to maneuver and convince intelligent people around him to support him and plege allegiance to him; thereby ensuring his position as the leader of Communist Russia. Under his ruling, he arrested 40million people and 7million died during his regime and under his command... You may go "Huh?", but that was real.

One of his sons died in the early 90s. I wonder if he has any grand children? Would love to meet them...:-)

Quote

"It's never too late or, in my case, too early to be whoever you want to be. There's no time limit, stop whenever you want. You can change or stay the same, there are no rules to this thing. We can make the best or the worst of it. I hope you make the best of it. And I hope you see things that startle you. I hope you feel things you never felt before. I hope you meet people with a different point of view. I hope you live a life you're proud of. If you find that you're not, I hope you have the strength to start all over again."

Benjamin Button in a letter to his daughter

Health! Health! More Health!

It's important to be healthy, really. The idiotic illness that struck me 2 days ago really put me off. Though my overall well-being was ok, it caused a lot of discomfort so much so that I was not able to sleep at all. DBS Bank CEO was diagnosed to have leukemia. Who would have expected that to happen? C'mon, life is short. We do not have to take things too seriously. Learn how to let go. Well, having said that, it is important to take our work seriously, coz we are paid to do a job. Always do a good and proper job, no run-of-the-mills performance. If we know we can't cope with too many things at one time, we must learn how to manage our time and our own expectations.

I am glad that I was given 2 days medical leave. Alas, I can rest well at home. When I say rest well, it's really resting well.

This pictures show an oil boomtown in the 1930s. Who would have thought that we would be hit by such an economic crisis which could be worse than the 1929 depression? Life is so unpredictable, live each day as it is. Just be happy.

Time After Time

Lying in my bed I hear the clock tick,
and think of you
caught up in circles confusion--
is nothing new
Flashback--warm nights--
almost left behind
suitcases of memories,
time after--

sometimes you picture me--
I'm walking too far ahead
you're calling to me, I can't hear
what you've said--
Then you say--go slow--
I fall behind--
the second hand unwinds

chorus:
if you're lost you can look--and you will find me
time after time
if you fall I will catch you--I'll be waiting
time after time

after my picture fades and darkness has
turned to gray
watching through windows--you're wondering
if I'm OK
secrets stolen from deep inside
the drum beats out of time--

chorus:
if you're lost...

you said go slow--
I fall behind
the second hand unwinds--

chorus:
if you're lost...
...time after time
time after time
time after time
time after time

Mr. Tambourine Man

Mr. Tambourine Man
Bob Dylan

Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to.
Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
In the jingle jangle morning I'll come followin' you.

Though I know that evenin's empire has returned into sand,
Vanished from my hand,
Left me blindly here to stand but still not sleeping.
My weariness amazes me, I'm branded on my feet,
I have no one to meet
And the ancient empty street's too dead for dreaming.

Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to.
Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
In the jingle jangle morning I'll come followin' you.

Take me on a trip upon your magic swirlin' ship,
My senses have been stripped, my hands can't feel to grip,
My toes too numb to step, wait only for my boot heels
To be wanderin'.
I'm ready to go anywhere, I'm ready for to fade
Into my own parade, cast your dancing spell my way,
I promise to go under it.

Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to.
Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
In the jingle jangle morning I'll come followin' you.

Though you might hear laughin', spinnin', swingin' madly across the sun,
It's not aimed at anyone, it's just escapin' on the run
And but for the sky there are no fences facin'.
And if you hear vague traces of skippin' reels of rhyme
To your tambourine in time, it's just a ragged clown behind,
I wouldn't pay it any mind, it's just a shadow you're
Seein' that he's chasing.

Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to.
Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
In the jingle jangle morning I'll come followin' you.

Then take me disappearin' through the smoke rings of my mind,
Down the foggy ruins of time, far past the frozen leaves,
The haunted, frightened trees, out to the windy beach,
Far from the twisted reach of crazy sorrow.
Yes, to dance beneath the diamond sky with one hand waving free,
Silhouetted by the sea, circled by the circus sands,
With all memory and fate driven deep beneath the waves,
Let me forget about today until tomorrow.

Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
I'm not sleepy and there is no place I'm going to.
Hey! Mr. Tambourine Man, play a song for me,
In the jingle jangle morning I'll come followin' you.

New Year's Resolution

Another year has passed with a wink. Time is so cruel, it passes even without one notices how fast it flies. What have I learnt? What have I improved on? There are so many things to learn everyday. It takes more than a lifetime to learn and absorb everything in this universe. What's going to happen to me and the people around me tomorrow? No one knows. Is Gundum everything?:-) Haha, of course not! Is David Achuleta everything? Is the Killers everything? Is fine dining everything? Is money everything? Is career everything? Well.....it's up to the individual. Most importantly; sincerity, peace of mind, willingness to let go of things, no attachments, nothingness....are key.

Dedication to JL

Gundum Gundum
My fountain of Happiness
My fountain of Sadness

Gundum Gundum
Your Fasination
Is my Obsession

Gundum Gundum
You are my Everything
Even when I have Nothing

Gundum Gundum
Your world is Heavenly
My world is Hell

Gundum Gundum
Who will I be
Without You?

Flurries, Flurries

Flurries,
Gently falling from the sky
She starts asking why

Flurries,
You make the background beautiful
But why are my troubles still so plentiful?

Flurries,
You come and go
But my troubles never slow

Flurries,
Darkness descend
Your pure whiteness still ascend

Flurries,
Your impermanence
Makes her see beyond all continents

Flurries,
All things are transient
She realises

Flurries,
She says
My troubles are miniscule

As compared with
The vastness
of the Earth

Aska はじまりはいつも雨

はじまりはいつも雨

The beginning
Starts with the rain

Pitter Patter
Pitter Patter

The raindrops
Hit against my window

I look out
Seeing you
Standing in the rain

Arrggghhh.....
Don't know what to write. This is such a beautiful song. Can't write these days. Can't even spell properly. Wanted to tell a friend that she looked beautiful in her wedding gown, but could not spell 'beautiful', so had to replace the adjective with kirei. What a loser. Can't even communicate properly in English these days. Is it because I have stopped reading? I should continue reading, really. Did not even get to finish reading "In cold blood". Gosh. I wish I could write as well as those professional bloggers. How to brush up my command of English? I guess I gotta read, read, and read.

Anyways, 飛鳥さん最高です！

Vital Statistics

Took my height and weight this afternoon. Can't believe that I weigh 53kg at 1.61cm. My little tummy is getting bigger too. My waist line seems to have increased by 1cm? Damn. I recall some years back, I also weighed around 53kg and my weight went back to 49kg back in 2004 - 2006. Now it's increased by 4kg! Is my weight increasing due to age? Or is it due to the numerous meals that I had with customers in the last 3 months? I really dislike travelling overseas for business. I tend to over eat whenever I am on business trips. It really sucks.

The last time I ran was last Friday. And I did only 4km? But I was panting like crazy even before I completed the run. Oh man...... I better buck up and run more regularly.

Thoughts

Super tired from all the travellings.
There's always a price to pay for.
I wish I could become a 'normal' employee again.
No travellings, no 100 over emails to respond to, no conference calls, no meetings.
Just wanna a normal and peaceful life, with regular exercise.
Sigh.
Life is not easy.

Falling in Love at a Coffeeshop

I think that possibly, maybe I’m falling for you
Yes there’s a chance that I’ve fallen quite hard over you.
I’ve seen the paths that your eyes wander down
I want to come too…

I think that possibly, maybe I’m falling for you

No one understands me quite like you do
Through all of the shadowy corners of me

I never knew just what it was
About this old coffee shop I love so much
All of the while I never knew…
Ahh…

I think that possibly, maybe I’m falling for you
Yes there’s a chance that I’ve fallen quite hard over you.
I’ve seen the waters that make your eyes shine
now I’m shining too

Because, oh because
I’ve fallen quite hard over you

If I didn’t know you, I'd rather not know
If I couldn’t have you, I'd rather be alone

I never knew just what it was
About this old coffee shop I love so much
All of the while, I never knew
I never knew just what it was
About this old coffee shop I love so much
All of the while, I never knew

All of the while, All of the while it was you
You…
You…
You…

Misia Discotheque Asia Tour 2008

Listening to Misia live at the Singapore Expo was 100 times better than listening to her on YouTube. Her 5-octave voice is superb and she is one of the best rock singer I have ever known!

We were pretty close to the stage and could see her clearly. She looks like a nice girl to me as she obliged the audience encore twice. The concert lasted for close to 2.5 hours! Wow, I truly enjoyed myself that night! You made my day, Misia! Though I was dog tired from my business trip, you really made my day!

Saving Private I

Private I
Though stout
Stands tall
Behind the ferry wheels

The sunrise glorifies his beauty
Signifying his determination
And strength

He keeps going
And going
And never gives up

That's the spirit
She says
Keep it up
She says

Save private I
Save private I
She says

Private I is saved
Private I is saved
He says

She smiles
A weak smile
Closes her eyes
And rest peacefully
Forever

The Happiness Project by Gretchen Rubin

In 1820, Smith wrote a letter to an unhappy friend, Lady Morpeth, in which he offered her tips for cheering up.

I have my own variety of tips lists for cheering up, and I was interested to hear what someone from two centuries ago would recommend. Most of Smith's suggestions are as sound now as they were almost 200 years ago – though a few are amusingly odd, and it might be tougher today to work "good blazing fires" into everyday life.

“1st. Live as well as you dare.
2nd. Go into the shower-bath with a small quantity of water at a temperature low enough to give you a slight sensation of cold, 75 or 80 degrees.
3rd. Amusing books.
4th. Short views of human life—not further than dinner or tea.
5th. Be as busy as you can.
6th. See as much as you can of those friends who respect and like you.
7th. And of those acquaintances who amuse you.
8th. Make no secret of low spirits to you friends, but talk of them freely—they are always worse for dignified concealment.
9th. Attend to the effects tea and coffee produce upon you.
10th. Compare your lot with that of other people.
11th. Don’t expect too much from human life—a sorry business at the best.
12th. Avoid poetry, dramatic representations (except comedy), music, serious novels, melancholy, sentimental people, and everything likely to excite feeling or emotion, not ending in active benevolence.
13th. Do good, and endeavour to please everybody of every degree.
14th Be as much as you can in the open air without fatigue.
15th. Make the room where you commonly sit gay and pleasant.
16th. Struggle by little and little against idleness.
17th. Don’t be too severe upon yourself, or underrate yourself, but do yourself justice.
18th. Keep good blazing fires.
19th. Be firm and constant in the exercise of rational religion.
20th. Believe me, dear Lady Georgiana.”

*
A thoughtful reader sent me the link to PocketMod, which shows you how to make your own mini-personal organizer. I can't wait to try it out myself.

*
Check out my new one-minute internet movie, Secrets of Adulthood.
http://www.secretsofadulthood.com/

Butterflies in my stomach

Starting something new come 1st August. Have been having butterflies in my stomach for the last 1 week. Anticipating it because of some damn good rewards but nervous coz some additional new responsibilities.

Some short-term goals (next 6 months):-

1)Excel in this new 'venture'
2)Nest
3)Continuous elation contingent upon.....homosapiens around me

Confidence, determination, hard work and integrity.

Accepting failures or semi-failures

Procrastination is the thief of time. How well said. Life is always full of challenges. No short-cuts to success and nothing's guaranteed. One does not expect that the sail is always on calm waters without the company of fierce storms, which is highly unrealistic. One faces the reality with bravery, go through failures and knocks with integrity, and there is always light at the end of the tunnel. Failures must be accepted with grace, and one has to move on with confidence and might. Sinking into "anti-elate" status is uncalled for, and it results in deteriotion of one's life, be it QoL, relationships, etc. Running away from problems is not a solution either. Proscratinating and wanting the best of both worlds are no solutions as well. Be decisive, focused, and think through carefully the consequences of the decision made. Always look at the brighter side of things. Remember, there is always light at the end of the tunnel.

Moving Back!

Have decided to move back to good old sunny Sin! It's been a rewardful 2 months in Vancouver. Is it worth moving back? I think it definitely is! A great career with one of the leading industry players in the industry. Why not? Decision to move back may be quite impromtu but it's still worth it, for sure.

I will have to work doubly hard and face and conquer all the challenges that I am going to face. If I work hard enough, I will be able to 'recoup' my 'losses' incurred in the last 2 months. Well, but not all's lost, anyways. I have gained much much much more than the materialistic stuff that were lost. Monetary loss is nothing. I can always earn back those that was lost within a couple of months with this job.

No more run-of-the-mill performance at work for both of us!

Looking forward to a 'new' life! Buri! Buri!

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Driving in N. America

Drove a total of about 180km within a day yesterday. Driving in N. America is pretty stress free; no worries about obnoxious taxi drivers tooting their honks at you, no tailgatings when you are a little slower, no swearings and pointings of middle fingers from nasty drivers. It was raining pretty hard and visibility was kindda poor. However, we still braved the rain to drive to Abbotsford, a small city about 72km west of Vancouver. I enjoyed the drive but full concentration was warranted since it is right-hand drive. Got a bit of time to get used to right-hand drive, but managed to get the gist of it within a couple of hours.

I am glad to be given this opportunity and it really boosted my confidence to drive on highways in N. America.

The only sad thing that happened was that another car behind us skidded and bumped into our car when we stopped at a red light junction. The driver is a lady and she was very apologetic towards us. Well, guess she will have to pay the rental company's damages, if any.

青のレクイエム

This is like a dream, or like a lie
one harsh morning everything was taken away from me

Soon I will sink into the cold depth of the sky
as the moon silently fades and my breathing stops

A single drop of melody
returns to my waiting hands
as it spills from the organ

Should I ask for someone to warm me?
or to hold my frozen body
No matter what I wish or pray for
this love has already been lost

A drop of kindness drops into the sandglass
even my tears have gone to a frozen place

When you’re honest with me, I don’t want to go
my overflowing feelings tell me to be with you
But no matter how much my heart cries out or sighs
my voice no longer reaches you
this love can no longer return...

元ちとせ 青のレクイエム

いつか風になる日 Itsuka kaze ni naru hi

yagate kitto so kitto, towa wa setsuna ni satte.
dakedo zutto ah zutto koko ni ite ageru
tada kaze ga fuite iru.

There is no such time that lasts forever.
But I will be always here with you.
Do you feel the breeze around you?

Crossroad

At the crossroad
Of life
One ponders

To smell
The fragrance around
Or to ignore
And fall
Into abyss
Willingly

Light at
the end of the tunnel
No doubt

But is one willing
To go through
The hardship

When one is so
Sheltered

It's the journey
Not the destination
That
Counts

Random Thoughts

Unproductivity is spending time gossiping in the office instead of doing real work.
Unproductivity is sitting in front of my laptop and not able to do anything.
Unproductivity is having nothing to do in the office
Unproductivity is taking a few hours to get a job done when it can be done within an hour.

And how does unproductivity come about?

It all depends on the individual. I may not be assigned any work to do (well, that's the bosses' job!) but I can DO something else to improve myself:-) I can refrain from participating in gossips, I can refrain from daydreaming in front of the laptop....(guess it's ok to daydream occasionally:-). I can expedite a job and do it perfectly well without having to drag it for hours. Everything's within my control, EVERYTHING. It's all in the mind.

Lapland

Guess what time it was when this pic was taken? Well.....it was around 12.30pm or so in the afternoon. Winter in Scandinavia, Kiruna, the most northern city in Sweden. Long nights and much shorter days, around 3-4 hours of daylight.

I remember when I was in Xinjiang in late Spring, it was the opposite. The days were long; the sun was still up in the sky at 12 midnight...midnight sun.

Anyways, these are the moments that I cherished most!

Changing ya badself

How The Brain Rewires Itself
Friday, Jan. 19, 2007 By Sharon Begley

IT WAS A FAIRLY MODEST EXPERIMENT as these things go, with volunteers trooping into the lab at Harvard Medical School to learn and practice a little five-finger piano exercise. Neuroscientist Alvaro Pascual-Leone instructed the members of one group to play as fluidly as they could, trying to keep to the metronome's 60 beats per minute. Every day for five days, the volunteers practiced for two hours. Then they took a test.

At the end of each day's practice session, they sat beneath a coil of wire that sent a brief magnetic pulse into the motor cortex of their brain, located in a strip running from the crown of the head toward each ear. The so-called transcranial-magnetic-stimulation (TMS) test allows scientists to infer the function of neurons just beneath the coil. In the piano players, the TMS mapped how much of the motor cortex controlled the finger movements needed for the piano exercise. What the scientists found was that after a week of practice, the stretch of motor cortex devoted to these finger movements took over surrounding areas like dandelions on a suburban lawn.

The finding was in line with a growing number of discoveries at the time showing that greater use of a particular muscle causes the brain to devote more cortical real estate to it. But Pascual-Leone did not stop there. He extended the experiment by having another group of volunteers merely think about practicing the piano exercise. They played the simple piece of music in their head, holding their hands still while imagining how they would move their fingers. Then they too sat beneath the TMS coil.

When the scientists compared the TMS data on the two groups--those who actually tickled the ivories and those who only imagined doing so--they glimpsed a revolutionary idea about the brain: the ability of mere thought to alter the physical structure and function of our gray matter. For what the TMS revealed was that the region of motor cortex that controls the piano-playing fingers also expanded in the brains of volunteers who imagined playing the music--just as it had in those who actually played it.

"Mental practice resulted in a similar reorganization" of the brain, Pascual-Leone later wrote. If his results hold for other forms of movement (and there is no reason to think they don't), then mentally practicing a golf swing or a forward pass or a swimming turn could lead to mastery with less physical practice. Even more profound, the discovery showed that mental training had the power to change the physical structure of the brain.

THINKING ABOUT THINKING:

AS SCIENTISTS PROBE the limits of neuroplasticity, they are finding that mind sculpting can occur even without input from the outside world. The brain can change as a result of the thoughts we think, as with Pascual-Leone's virtual piano players. This has important implications for health: something as seemingly insubstantial as a thought can affect the very stuff of the brain, altering neuronal connections in a way that can treat mental illness or, perhaps, lead to a greater capacity for empathy and compassion. It may even dial up the supposedly immovable happiness set point.

In a series of experiments, for instance, Jeffrey Schwartz and colleagues at the University of California, Los Angeles, found that cognitive behavior therapy (CBT) can quiet activity in the circuit that underlies obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD), just as drugs do. Schwartz had become intrigued with the therapeutic potential of mindfulness meditation, the Buddhist practice of observing one's inner experiences as if they were happening to someone else.

When OCD patients were plagued by an obsessive thought, Schwartz instructed them to think, "My brain is generating another obsessive thought. Don't I know it is just some garbage thrown up by a faulty circuit?" After 10 weeks of mindfulness-based therapy, 12 out of 18 patients improved significantly. Before-and-after brain scans showed that activity in the orbital frontal cortex, the core of the OCD circuit, had fallen dramatically and in exactly the way that drugs effective against OCD affect the brain. Schwartz called it "self-directed neuroplasticity," concluding that "the mind can change the brain."

安全地帯 碧い瞳のエリス Anzenchitai

あなたに

sangatsu kokonotsu - remioromen

9th March

Sangatsu kokonoka (Goodbye version)

9th March

Ikea in Stockholm

Didn't get a chance to see Ikea in Sweden. It was closed due to Christmas holidays. What a pity.

Aurora Borealis

Witnessed the aurora borealis in Lapland. Nature is so amazing. Though it was not truly breathtaking, I was in complete awe. While everyone was riding the snow mobile, I actually saw it occurring already... It appeared as flashes of green...but too bad, no other colors like red, purple or orange. Anyways, it was a sight to behold. Hope to catch the really nice one in the near future.

恋におちて

Life
Means
Seeking
Happiness

Happiness
Means
Living
For your
Loved Ones

Loved Ones
Will
Always
Be there
For Me

Me
Myself, and
I

I'd
rather be
Alone

Being Alone
Brings
Less
Sufferings
To
People
Around Me
Sufferings

Sufferings
are afterall
Part & Parcel
of
Life

Life
Is
Back to square one
It is
About
Happiness

Happiness
Means
Living
For your
Loved Ones
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

徳永英明 最後の言い訳

It’s so painful pretending to be asleep now
The drops that fall are tears
And you’ll wait for the dawn and then go
Because it’s you who’s afraid of the dark

The thing that’s most precious to me has become the furthest away
I knew you so well, and now it’s all a memory

I think everyone likes you
I’ll miss you, you don’t need to worry about that
What makes it so painful
Is the fact that you think you’re doing me a favour by saying goodbye

You’re the closest to me, and yet the hardest to understand
I loved you so much, and now it’s all an excuse

The thing that’s most precious to me has become the furthest away
I knew you so well, and now it’s all a memory

It’s all a memory

You’re the closest to me, and yet the hardest to understand
I loved you so much, and now it’s all an excuse

The thing that’s most precious to me has become the furthest away
You’re the closest to me, and yet the hardest to understand
The thing that’s most precious to me has become the furthest away

Which way should I go?

Scurrying down the street
I hesitated
Which way should I go?

At a loss,
I hastened my steps
Which way should I go?

Without turning back
I continued walking
Which way should I go?

To surge forward
Or, to reverse
Which way should I go?

Happiness is a state of mind
So says many
But still
Which way should I go?

Through the Barricades

Mother doesnt know where love has gone
She says it must be youth
That keeps us feeeling strong
See it in her face, that's turned to ice
And when she smiles she shows
The lines of sacrifice

And now I know what they're saying
When the sun begins to fade
And we made our love on wasteland
And through the barricades

Father made my history
He fought for what he thought
Would set us somehow free
He tought me what to say in school
I learned off by heart
But now thats torn in two

And now I know what they're saying
In the music of the parade
We made our love on wasteland
And through the barricades

Born on different sides of life
We feel the same
And feel all of this strife
So come to me when Im asleep
We'll cross the line
And dance upon the street

And now I know what they're saying
When the drums begin to fade
We made our love on wasteland
And through the barricades

Oh, turn around and Ill be there
There's a scar through my heart
But I'll bare it again
I thought we were the human race
But we were just another border-line-case
And the stars reach down and tell us
That there's always one escape
I dont know where love has gone
And in this trouble land
Desperation keep us strong
Friday's child is full of soul
With nothing left to lose
There's everything to go

And now I know what they're are saying
It's a terrible beauty we've made
So we make our love on wasteland
And through the barricades
Now I know what they're are saying
As hearts go to their graves
We made our love on wasteland
And through the barricades.

Meguriai

This wish... whoever... this wish
My lock is always open

So nice... this encounter, a chance encounter like this

Only this time, even covered with wounds, I still went out of my door
I extended my pointing finger, touching yours

The one who made others weep for love
and the one who was made to weep,
They might as well share the blame equally

Do not let go of this hand (The two of us)
We don't have the map of stars (We don't feel lost)
And we are not able to exchange much words

So at the end (These eyes)
If I was forgiven (If it ends)
When I look back, at the end you are the one

Even when all were lost, we two are one

Watching the people who see the bus of love they failed to catch driving away
the two of us, sitting here, are gently rocked

However hard I tried to warm it up,
my courage still could not hatch

Beauty that could not take shape ...
how vexing it was to be waken from the sweet dream

The bus they failed to catch (love was)
watching the people seeing it off (sent across)
The two of us here (in chance encounter)
are gently rocked (two of us here)

The bus they failed to catch (love was)
watching the people seeing it off (sent across)
The two of us here (in chance encounter)
are gently rocked (two of us here)

The one who made others weep for love
and the other who was made to weep
They might as well share the blame equally

This wish... whoever... this wish

So nice... this encounter, a chance encounter like this

失恋して聴いたら元気になれました。飛鳥の声に癒されます。

Αντιο

Μακαρι να ηταν νεκρος. Γιατι η ζωη μου μια τετοια αθλιοτητα; Εγω πιστευω σθεναρα οτι υπαρχουν πολλες ζωες με πολυ πιο αθλιοτητες, ενα εκατομμυριο φορες χειροτερη απο την δικη μου. Γι 'αυτο δεν θα πρεπει να σκεφτονται να πεθαινει. Εγω δεν θα πρεπει να αισθανεται ετσι. Ειμαι θυμωμενος, λιγο πολυ θυμωμενος. Γιατι ειναι τοσο ρευστη ευτυχια μου; Γιατι ειναι αντικειμενο μονο ενα ατομο; Γιατι εν λογω προσωπο δεν μπορει να ειναι ισχυρη και αποφασισμενη; Γιατι εν λογω προσωπο δεν μπορει να προσπαθησει να βελτιωσει; ΓΙΑΤΙ; ΓΙΑΤΙ; ΓΙΑΤΙ; ΓΙΑΤΙ; ΓΙΑΤΙ; πρεπει να εχω κανει κατι πραγματικα λαθος μου στην προηγουμενη ζωη. Ζωη μου ποτε δεν ηταν πραγματικα καλη. Εχει περασει τοσα χρονια. Τι ειναι ευτυχια; Που μπορει να βρει την αληθινη ευτυχια;

Μονη στο σκοταδι
Ι χαμηλοτερα το κεφαλι μου
Με την απροσεξια

Μαλλια μου πεφτει μαζι με αυτην
Καλυπτοντας το προσωπο μου χωρις κνησμο

Εξω απο το παραθυρο
Ο ουρανος ειναι γκρι
Και δεν προκειται ποτε ποτε σειρα του γκει

Οι βροχες προβλεπεται να χυθουν
Με βαρια καρδια
Θα στριφογυρισουν
Καθοριζονται και προβλεπονται

Αντιο
Forever


Alone in the darkness
I lower my head
With carelessness

My hair falls along with it
Covering my face without any itch

Outside the window
The sky is grey
And it will never ever turn gay

The rain comes pouring down
With a heavy heart
I tumble
Down and down

Goodbye
Forever

SAY YES（Edited Single Ver. with Live） / CHAGE and ASKA

Tokyo, Japan

18th December – Flight to Tokyo

19th December, Wednesday – Touched down. Explored Shinjuku till 1pm. Tried checking in but no room available. Had curry rice for lunch. Finally got into 1704. Showered and slept. Had Freshness Burger and Yoshinoya as take-outs for dinner

20th December, Thursday – Had inagu with rice for lunch. Went to Tokyo Disneyland. It was a disappointment. Had miso-based ramen for dinner @ one of the ramen shops in Shinjuku, which is located near Oakwood. Retired after the dinner.

21st December, Friday – Shopping @ Shibuya the whole day. Can't remember what we had for lunch. Had Ramen for dinner@ Ichiran, the famous Ramen stall located in Shibuya. Instead of the usual Japanese-style eating 'configuraton' whereby everyon eats along side-by-side, customers at this special ramen shop eats in his own 'cubicle'. Very interesting experience.

22nd December,Saturday - Tsukiji fish market. Waited for more than an hour to eat the so-called freshest sushi @ Dawai. Walked to Ginza. Shopped at Uniglo and bought stuff. Rushed back to hotel to meet Ayako. It's been more than 2 years since I last saw her. Ayako brought us to Harujuku. Saw crowds gathering at the stadium and realized that there was a concert going on……it was Chage & Aska performing! Dinner at Wolfgang Puck with Ayako. Nice dinner for 3 @ SGD65. Wow. Farewell to our dear friend who was going to the mountain for snow-boarding.

23rd December, Sunday – Went to Isetan @ Shibuya. Yawn, yawn. Had Go-go curry for lunch. HUGE serving @ 650 and 1000 yen. Subway to Harajuku again. Went to Yoyogi Park and visited a shrine there. Couples getting married and the events were solemn. The highlight of the day was – Of course “Chage & Aska” concert! We love Chage & Aska! Went to Shibuya after the concert. Tokyo Tower at night. Awesome sight. Had chicken wings that were bought from the basement @ Isetan Shibuya for dinner.

24th December,Monday – Christmas Eve. Had the seemed to be famous Er4 Lang3 noodles. It was yucky. Shopped @ Shinjuku. Went to Yasukuni Shrine. Had mochi. They were great. More shopping at Shinjuku. Dinner was soba at one of the shops in Shinjuku. The soba was awesome! It is the best soba that I have ever eaten in my entire life!!!

It was an unforgettable trip. One of my dreams came true in this trip and it was watching Chage & Aska LIVE! The finale was great. They actually sang "Say Yes" during the encore. OMG! Melted.......

25th Dec, departed from Tokyo....sigh

Marathon Results

Rank RaceNr Name Gender Nation TimeGun TimeStart Time7k7 Time21k Time26k75 GunFinish
867 7387 JESSIE F SIN 5:30:11 5:35:09 1:01:48 2:46:56 3:32:53 6:26:56

ChipFinish
6:21:58

Total number of women runners: 1385

Result sucks but at least I completed the 42.195km. But with ample training, I believe I can do much better than this. My aim was to complete my first marathon, which I did. So I am really very happy with myself.

The next marathon will be below 6hours!

Speed of Sound

"Speed Of Sound"

How long before I get in?
Before it starts, before I begin?
How long before you decide?
Before I know what it feels like?
Where To, where do I go?
If you never try, then you'll never know.
How long do I have to climb,
Up on the side of this mountain of mine?

Look up, I look up at night,
Planets are moving at the speed of light.
Climb up, up in the trees,
every chance that you get,
is a chance you seize.
How long am I gonna stand,
with my head stuck under the sand?
I'll start before I can stop,
before I see things the right way up.

All that noise, and all that sound,
All those places I got found.
And birds go flying at the speed of sound,
to show you how it all began.
Birds came flying from the underground,
if you could see it then you'd understand?

Ideas that you'll never find,
All the inventors could never design.
The buildings that you put up,
Japan and China all lit up.
The sign that I couldn't read,
or a light that I couldn't see,
some things you have to believe,
but others are puzzles, puzzling me.

All that noise, and all that sound,
All those places I got found.
And birds go flying at the speed of sound,
to show you how it all began.
Birds came flying from the underground,
if you could see it then you'd understand,
ah when you see it then you'll understand?

All those signs, I knew what they meant.
Some things you can invent.
Some get made, and some get sent,
Ooh?
Birds go flying at the speed of sound,
to show you how it all began.
Birds came flying from the underground,
if you could see it then you'd understand,
ah, when you see it then you'll understand?

Your Life Story

A bright pessimism
An elated sadness

A cruel kindness
An invisible support

Your life story
Comprises of these elements

Feeling lonely
In a crowded square

You circle, round and round
Will you ever
Reach your destination?

Will you ever
See the
Light at the end of the tunnel?

It's all up to you
Really

Don't need to feel down
It's all up to you

Hell on Earth

Yeah, hell on earth. "Must be positive!", so says Patricia Mok in My Sassy Neighbour. Easier say than done, eh? How to stay positive when one is down with everything? Panick attacks, narcorleptic, OCD, hunch-back, pimples, ezyma,asthma, etc, etc. You name it. One has everything that is associated with the negative aspects of everything about life. Patricia Mok, can you tell me how one can stay positive with one is invaded with so many dreaded diseases? Yeah, these are not life-threatening, and you may say they are no big deals. Terminal illnesses are worse. However, do you expect one to live with all these for the rest of his or her life? Even though he or she happens to live till a ripe old age? Any answers? How does a mentally ill patient live through the rest of her or his life? How does a schizophrenia live for the rest of her or his life? We are not schizos. We are not mentally ill. We do not know what goes through their minds. So who are we to comment? Who are we to exclaim "Must be positive!" They are all bullshits, arent' they?

If wishes came true

Isn't this song awesome? There are so many nice songs in the early 90s and they bring back lots of memories!

If wishes came true
I'd be someone always special in your heart
We'd still be lovers, not apart
If wishes came true

If wishes came true
I'd have white Christmas every year
If wishes came true
I'd be free of worries

If wishes came true
I'd be so perfect
That I do not err
Though to err is human

If wishes came true
The world would be so beautiful
Everyone around me would be so beautiful
That we would be someone special in
Everyone's heart

And
The list goes on......

Sweet Sensation - If Wishes Came True

Winter

Winter's here
And I wonder
Where's Fall?

Fall has slipped me by
Without saying Goodbye

Looking at the November
Night sky
I wonder why

Time has passed me by
Without leaving anything behind

Winter comes,
Winter goes

Then Spring comes,
Spring goes

Year after year,
Round and round
Round and round

Like a
Never Ending Story

Close your eyes

Hitomi wo Tojite
Lyrics: Hirai Ken Music: Hirai Ken

Asa mezameru tabi ni kimi no nuke kara ga yoko nii ru
Nukumori wo kanjita itsumono senaka ga tsumetai

Nigawarai wo yamete omoi KAATEN wo ake you
Mabushi sugiru asahi boku to mainichi no oikakekkoda

Ano hi miseta nakigao namida terasu yuuhi kata no nukumori
Keshi sarouto negau tabi ni kokoro ga karada ga kimi wo oboeteiru

Your love forever
Hitomi wo tojite kimi wo egaku yo sore dakede ii
Tatoe kisetsu ga boku no kokoro wo okizari ni shitemo

Itsuka wa kimi no koto nani mo kanji naku naru no kana
Ima no itami daite nemuru houga mada ii kana

Ano hi miteta hoshizora negai kakete futari sagashita hikari wa
Matatakuma ni kieteku no ni kokoro wa karada wa kimi de kagayaiteru

I wish forever
Hitomi wo tojite kimi wo egaku yo soreshika deki nai
Tatoe sekai ga boku wo nokoshite sugi sarou toshite mo

Your love forever
Hitomi wo tojite kimi wo egaku yo sore dakede ii
Tatoe kisetsu ga boku wo nokoshite iro wo kaeyou tomo

Kioku no naka ni kimi wo sagasu yo sore dakede ii
Nakushita mono wo koeru tsuyosa wo kimi ga kuretakara
Kimi ga kuretakara

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Every morning I’d awake, you naked beside me
I’d feel your warmth, but your back was always cold

Stop smiling so bitterly, open that serious curtain
the morning light is dazzling, but you chase it and me away every day

That one day, you saw me cry, my tears shining in the setting sun
Even if I wish I wouldn’t, my heart, my body, they remember the warmth of your shoulder

Your love forever
Close your eyes, let me paint your picture, even if my heart
becomes deserted through the changing seasons, this much would do me good

One day, I would no longer be able to feel you here
It’ll be okay if I sleep on my side, hugging the pain inside

That one night, I wished upon a star as we both searched for the light
The twinkle faded, but in my heart, my body, you still shine

I wish forever
Close your eyes, let me paint your picture, even if the world should
abandon me, this would help me get through it all

Your love forever
Close your eyes, let me paint your picture, even if my heart
becomes deserted through the changing seasons, this much would do me good

I found you as I searched my memorories, and it’s okay
because you gave me the strength I need to get over the things I lost
That’s what you gave to me

Ken Hirai- Hitomi wo tojite

Sufferings of a Sane Person

It's been quite a while since I posted my last entry. GMAT is in 2 week's time. Full marathon is in less than 8 week's time. That thing is haunting me all the time. Contradictions, that's "opposite of demise". You either live it as it is everyday, or you look forward to something that you really and eagerly look forward to, but things never turn out the way you want them to be. You do good, but bad things always un-do you. They wear you out, they lead you to thoughts of deciisu (decipher this), especially in the heat of a moment. It must have been the thoughts, all the corrupted thoughts. That's why the sgnirffeus (decipher this). What goes around comes around. It's Karma.

Perception Vs Reality

Definition of perception in Merriam Webster dictionary

Function: Noun
1a: Result of perceiving, observation 1b: A mental image
3a: Awareness of elements through physical sensation b: physical sensation experienced in the light of experience
4a: A quick, acute, intuition cognition b: A capacity for comprehension

Definition of reality in Merriam Webster dictionary

Function: Noun
1: the quality or state of being real
2a: A real event, entity, or state of affairs

Perception and reality are clearly defined in dictionaries but in 'reality', are they the same? Or are they entirely different?

What we perceive are things that we see around us and how we interpret these things that we have seen. Does perception translate into reality? Hmm... this is debatable, but a good example of perception being different from reality is a slim girl whom people perceive as physically weak (because of her size), but in reality, she is able to do menial physical tasks on her own (at least physical tasks that people in general think that she can't do due to her size!). Hey, this is a real-life example as I am the protagonist of this example!:-)

I recall an ex-boss telling me that perception is reality. How people perceive you is crucial because that is how people in general form conclusion about you, about your capability, your personality, practically everything about you. However, I beg to differ. By doing so, isn't one's judgement's impaired? If one does not know another person entirely, or hardly interacts with the person, what can he conclude about this person? How much can he comment on this person? So is judging a book by its cover the right way to go?

There's no doubt that 1st impression lasts, especially in job interviews. But it's still a person's overall 'intelligence' that REALLY last.

Beautiful SF

Beautiful SF skyline
With a
Beautiful Mind
In it

Beautiful SF skyline
Posseses a
Beautiful Heart

Beautiful SF Skyline
Has a
Beautiful beau
Missing

Beautiful SF Skyline
I
Salute You!

Living Life with a good heart

Question: How does one develop the will to do what is good and virtuous?

Answer: This topic is also connected with ways to develop inner strength. Another technique is to investigate, 'What is the meaning of life? What is the meaning of money? What is the meaning of body?' Investigate more; think more. Then, you will develop conviction that all these physical things, as well as your life, have an end. There is a point at which they give you sadness. Money, wealth, or fame - if you think deeply - ultimately do not afford permanent happiness and thus are not worthy of being sought as the final object of attainment.

Nirvana may be the final object of attainment, but at the moment, it is difficult to reach. Thus, the practical and realistic aim is compassion, a warm heart, serving other people, helping others, respecting others, being less selfish. By practising these, you can gain benefit and happiness that remain longer. If you investigate the purpose of life and, with the motivation that results from this inquiry, develop a good heart, compassion and love - using your whole life this way, then each day will become useful and meaningful. I think that this is the main method to develop will.
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This is a teaching excerpt from the Dalai Lama at Harvard.

I can't agree more on the above answer. But sometimes I just ponder over how to handle people who are selfish towards me? People who are nasty towards me? People who say hurtful things about my loved ones? People who are not nice in general? People who are fake and pretend to be nice towards you? Still searching for an answer......I guess I still have a long way to go.....

Judy Collins - Both Sides Now

Vanessa Williams

Saving the Best for Last

The Sweetest Day

One day when I pass on,
I pray that this song will play on

The Sweetest Day
What does it encompass?

The Sweetest Day
It's also the Happiest Day

The Sweetest Day
It's also the most memorable Day

How many Sweetest Days does one have in his entire life?
Just one? two? or more?

What matters most
Is that
This Sweetest Day
Is forever
Buried deep inside
Deep within
The abyss
of
My Heart
My Memory

"You and I, in this moment
Holding the night so close
Hanging on, still unbroken
While outside the thunder rolls

Listen now, you can hear our heartbeat
Warm against lifes bitter cold
These are the days
The sweetest days we'll know

There are times that scare me
Were rattle the house like a wind
Both of ours so unbending
We battle the fear within

All the while, life is rushing by us
Hold it now and dont let go
These are the days
The sweetest days we'll know

So well whisper a dream here in the darkness
Watching the stars till theyre gone
And then even the memories have all faded away
These days go on and on

Listen now, you can hear our heartbeat
Hold me now and dont let go
These are the days
Every day is the sweetest day we'll know

These are the days
The sweetest days we'll know"

Nothingness

Nothing is synonymous with vacuum, which is more profound than emptiness.
Doing nothing is synonymous with valueless, which is worse than suffering.
This explains why humans need to do something to keep themselves going.
I personally experienced this myself.

When I was holidaying in Hanoi 2 weeks ago, I did nothing during my free time. I merely watched TV, brainless TV programmes. After that short break, I found my brain not working as well as it should be. I suddenly realised that I had forgotten quite a few words that I had learnt in the last couple of weeks. It really makes me shudder, will I pass my GMAT? I guess I better start looking through the questions and studying them seriously!

Word of the day from M-W : Chiliad (pronounced as kill-leead)

group of 1000

What's the difference between a chiliad and a millennium? Not much: both words refer to a period of 1000 years. While "millennium" is more widely used, "chiliad" is actually older. It first appeared in 1598 and was originally used to mean "a group of 1000," as in "a chiliad of errors." "Millennium" didn't make its way into written English until the 1630s. Not surprisingly, both words trace back to roots that mean "thousand." "Millenium" comes from the Latin "mille," and "chiliad" is a descendent of the Greek "chilioi."

The Truth of Impermanence

There is a tendency for human beings to visualise the truth of impermanence in terms of death and decay only. We tend to relate this truth only in the negative aspect. We tend to forget the flip side of the coin. The rain comes after sunshine, but sunshine also comes after the rain! Impermanence means "constant change" of all phenomena. This truth is neutral. It is what makes possible the transforming of bad situations for the better (and vice versa). Impermanance can therefore, offer hopes!

Everything arises and passes on
When you see this,
You are away from sorrow

- Dhammapada

Everything above refers to all things and situations both bad and good. When in suffering, know that "This too, shall pass." Take it easy and be realistically hopeful for a change for the better. When in joy (of the worldly), know that, "This too, shall pass." Treasure it, but don't be attached. Transcend it if you can, transform it into unconditioned happiness. Seeing impermanence is not to make us free from sorrow through glum freezing up of our hearts. It makes us more true and authentically alive to the flux of all things great and small!

JY Salon

Hate going to salons that overcharge and do not provide professional hair cuts. Yes, customer service may be good, but think about it. What's their objective of chatting up with customers and being friendly with customers? There are hair salons out there, particularly a famous one here, which sells packages at something like S$988 and S$1355 for 5 or 8 visits respectively. Why the hard selling? Take note, owner of this chain of salons, if your guys keep 'pestering' customers to buy packages, there won't be regular customers coming back to your salon. Main reason is because these customers do not want to be harassed or coerced into buying packages.Get it?

I paid more than S$250 and yet I am greatly dissatisfied with the hair cut given to me. I am not sure if their quality of silk rebonding is good, coz I am only into my 2nd day. I remember, sometime this time last year, I went to a salon with a Japanese name, that was my 2nd time to the salon. My 1st experience in that salon was generally good. The haircut was done by a guy, and he was pretty professional and he did a pretty good job. However, my 2nd experience there was disastrous. The cut was done by a lady and the impression that she gave me right from the beginning was bad. REAL BAD. She didn't seem to have a passion for cutting someone else's hair. She was like going through the motion of hair cutting and the end result? It was disastrous. From then onwards, I swore not go to into that salon anymore. Never. Ever.

And guess what? Yesterday, I wanted to give another salon chain a try, so I went to its branch in Tampines. The experience in the salon was generally good. However, I dislike the look that was given to me. I dislike the fact that the lady at the counter kept persuading me to buy the stupid package. She didn't give me GOOD reasons why I should buy. What they said is "Oh, it's worth buying". Give me a break.

In any case, I just wanna say to the owner of this salon (btw, I don't want to mention the name upfront, but you should know who you are). I will never, ever step into any of your salons again. If friends were to ask me about your salaon, I will tell them frankly about the "pressure" that I experienced, though I have to admit that it was not great. However, for people who are not resistant to such pressure-selling, I bet they could have pressured into buying the packages.

So, please. When a customer says 'NO' to your offer the 1st time. Do not keep pressurizing them into buying packages that only your own hairdressers think its worth buying. It was damn obvious to me that the package has no benefits to customers, but who makes money at the end of the day??????????? YOU know the answer.

Crying Out Love In The Center of The World MV

世界の中心で、愛をさけぶ

What can I say?

Tiredness

Physical and mental tiredness. They seem to be consuming me for the last many months. Why do some people still feel tired after so much rest? I guess it's because of the burdens that they carry. They bring their worries with them everywhere they go, both conciously or unconsciously. Burdens make one's shoulders feel heavy, they make one's footsteps heavier, they make one's breathing heavier, and they make one's eyelids droop further.

How does one keep a balance between staying lethargic and energetic? I guess one has to stay positive, really positive. But the question is, how does one stay positive? It's all in the mind, I guess. What does one do to stay positive? Does staying or rather, pretending to be happy and positive help? Well, I think it does help to a certain extent. I am not sure, but so far it has helped me quite a fair bit. I can be feeling so lousy when I am on my own. But when I am with people, I revert to my 'reel' self. Just like showing the unreal me to people, so as to prevent people from asking why I am feeling so down. And when I put on a 'brave' front, it helps me forget my real problems....at least temporarily.

Birds of a same Feathers Flock together!

It is really strange how human relationship works. One tends to hang out with people who are of the same kind as oneself. As the saying goes "Birds of a same feathers flock together". Wells, how true this idiom is. Some people think that they are perfect, love to criticize others, and talk behind peoples' back. But they are not aware that by criticizing and gossiping, they are making themselves imperfect. Or rather, they are just as 'bad' as those people whom they criticize. There are people who even rile sarcastic remarks at their 'enemies' on their blogs. Don't these people realise that by doing so, it reflects a lot on themselves? When will they wake up their idea?

There are some who even claim that they are extremely religiously inclined and that they believe in doing good. What is the definition of doing good? By being sarcastic at people? Gossiping all the time? Spending time writing on their blogs about 'copycats' who 'copy' "HER" itinerary? By being selfish? What do you think of a housemate who simply refuses to answer incoming calls because she KNOWS that the calls which are ringing aren't for her? (And you know, she knew jolly well that the calls weren't for her because HER ENTIRE group of friends were with HER!!!) What a bitxx! And there is someone who HIDE YOUR grocery because she thinks that the grocey she hides belongs to one of their mutual friends who just moved out from the apartment. Isn't that a selfish and uncivilised act? There is also someone who GIVES instructions on who should sit in who's car when comes to car pooling. This particular someone also dictates with whom you should share the room with when comes to a tour. Who does she think she is?

When people first know each other, we always take people by face value. Therefore, when there are organised trips, we go together as a group. However, as time goes by, you see peoples' true colors. Sometimes, he is invited for an outing; and sometimes he's not invited. DO YOU KNOW WHY??????? SCROLL down for an answer

Birds of a same feathers flock together
Birds of a same feathers flock together
Birds of a same feathers flock together
Birds of a same feathers flock together
Birds of a same feathers flock together

The answer to my earlier question is: Wells, he is invited BECAUSE the GROUP of birds need MORE people to SHARE the cost of petrol, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc, etc.

So I really wonder. When this group of birds rant how well they have travelled, how rich their travelling experiences have been, lalala, and lalala, have they ever wondered whether all these experiences have made them better people?????? . Gosh:-. In any case, I count myself lucky for not having met such birds yet....

But to you. Poor you.

What you can do is "Treat them as acquaintances".
Do not get upset by their remarks
Do not get upset by their behaviours or actions
Do not get upset by what they write on their blogs
Do not get upset by the expressions on their faces

You will be a much happier person.

Dinners

Attended the company's 10th anniversary D&D last night. Pretty well-organised considering the fact that they took less than a month to make preparations. Food was pretty good, there were sufficient entertainment to keep our moods elevated. The not-so-fun part was that no one really dressed up. Some guys were in t-shirts and jeans, and some gals were in jeans as well. Most gals wore black dresses, mostly spaghetti straps....so it was pretty boring. I didn't bother to dress up too. Wore the cheap polka dotted purple dress from H&M with the cole hann platfom shoes.:-) Actually, I thought it would be real fun if people could dress up....

Susie Wong performance was pretty fun, best part was that she engaged the participation of 2 of the guys from the company. With the 2 guys and Susie Wong clowning around, it made the room filled with lots of laughter.

Climax of this D&D? Hmm......guess there was none. BUT, I already had a BIG surprise before before the dinner started. One of my colleagues' hubby used to be my boss (though only for less than 1 month) in one of the previous companies! What a small world it is!

Gotta get up early this morning to go hiking. Hope everything goes well and hope I will enjoy the hike.

Doing Personal Stuff in Office

As mature working adults, we know that it is against company's policy to use company's PC to do our personal stuff. For egs, surfing info for our personal use, or chatting on the MSN....LET ALONE posting some stupid pics on the MSN (that's being used in the office).

There are so many retards out there and some retards are still insisting that they are brilliant. So what if it's a fucking art piece? So what? If the pic was offensive, would you still show the pic in ya msn? (ESPECIALLY using the company's computer!) My eyes couldn't be playing tricks on me. The moment I saw that pic, I found it grossly offensive. Mickey Mouse? My arse.

The retard really spoils my day. Anyways, I hope this retard is smart enough to DELETE all the personal pictures that are saved in the company's computer.

Clouds

Have been in love with clouds for as long as I remember. Especially cumulus clouds, those cotton lookalike clouds. I think my interest in clouds was stimulated by a Geography teacher in Sec 2. Since then, I have started observing clouds and staring at them (esp in the afternoons) whenever I am free. Used to do that when I was in the uni. Loved to stare at those clouds above me, admire them for their lightness and 'carefree' nature.

On my way home this afternoon, I saw beautiful cumulus clouds admist the bright blue sky. Really enjoyed it so much. Though the sun was high up there and the heat was kindda unbearable, the beautiful background of the cumulus clouds livened my mood and made me feel so good. Right now, as I am typing, I am enjoying my precious afternoon....Hope to continue reading "The Unbearable Lightness of Being", sip my coffee and munch on my favorite black peppered crab puff...Yummy!

Taking leave without any purpose is not so bad afterall. It's so nice to be at home on a quiet weekday afternoon. MF just SMSed me saying that he's bored.....Well, guess I don't feel as bored as he does! This poor man needs to catch up on his sleep as he is always busy with his 2 toddlers at night....and that results in lack of sleep everyday! HaHa!

From http://136067.brightwebsite.com/cloud-types/:-

There are three common main cloud types that form in the different layers of the atmosphere. There is also a fourth common cloud type that forms vertically.

High Layered Clouds that form above 17,000 feet are:

Cirrus: Delicate white strands of ice crystals that often form, what is referred to as “mares tails.”

Cirrostratus: A veil of white cloudiness often covering the entire sky, causing “halos
around the Sun and the moon. This can be an indicator of an approaching storm.

Cirrocumulus: Small white patchy patterns like fish scales and referred to as
“Mackerel skies.”

Mid-layered clouds that form between 6,000 to 17,000 feet are:

Altostratus: Drab gray clouds of water droplets that obscure the view of the Sun and moon. They have the potential to produce rain and snow.

Altocumulus: A darker, larger pattern of patchiness that may produce a shower.

Lower layered clouds that form below 6,000 feet are:

Stratus: A wispy cloud of fog that hangs a few hundred feet above the ground and
often bring drizzle.

Stratocumulus: Dark gray clouds, often covering the entire sky, which do not bring rain.
They form rounded wavelike bands that are broken by blue sky.

Nimbostratus: Low, dark, ragged rain clouds that often bring continuous rain, sleet, or snow.

The fourth common cloud types that form Vertically are:

Cumulus: Large, billowy “cotton balls” of clouds with dark bottoms and bright white tops that can reach 10,000 feet high. May produce brief showers.

Cumulonimbus: Towering thunderheads, dark on the bottom and white anvil-shaped tops that can extend to 50,000 feet. Often produces lightning and heavy precipitation, including hail. Occasionally produces tornadoes.

Table Soccer

It was really funny today when we played table soccer. Me, MF, John, and K. I am so used to playing midfielder and attack but when my role became defence, I really sucked BIG TIME. Every shot that K and J took went into the goal post. K & J are considered very new players. Including this afternoon's game, that was probably their 3rd time 'on the table':-)OMG. We were all laughing till we couldn't play at all!

However, in an earlier game with BK and KL, MF and I won the first game. It seems that my skills has improved:-), though most of the time I am merely 'groping' in the dark. No strategies, no precisioness, nothing.

But it was really fun playing with those guys. We had so much fun and everyone tried their best during the game. I don't know how long we can stay this way. I used to play with Wyman and MF but our dear friend,Wyman has since migrated down under. We miss you, man.

The Purpose of Life

The purpose of meaningful existence -- to discover the wisest way to exist, and to thus exist wisely.You may discover then, that it is the wisest way to be kind to yourself. This may bring you much happiness that you readily 'overflow' the happiness to others by sharing the Wisdom with them on how to live purposefully.

The whole process is the accumulation and perfection of the twin peaks of Compassion and Wisdom. What we want is happiness, and these two qualities are essential for it to be attained.

SF, Yosemite, and Vegas

Chancellor Hotel on Union Square is excellent. The rooms do not have air conditions but it's great for the type of weather in SF, though am not sure if the heat will be unbearable during summer.

What we did in SF:-

Day 1, Sunday - Had lunch at the Cheesecake Factory. Food is moderately good. The chocolate cheesecake is really rich, but our stomachs were not able to take in all of it!
- Window shopping at Nordstrom, and shopping centers and boutiques. Didn't buy any stuff coz Ian said it would be more worth shopping at premium outlets in Vegas. However, bought some shoes at DWS on the 3rd day at SF! Love the shoes there!

Day 2, Monday - Had brunch at a Thai restaurant. Their iced tea taste good but the food is mediocre........well, perhaps you can even say it's substandard. Walked around the city again and took the cable car to the Fisherman's Wharf. Went to Alcatras Island, a place where you only want to visit once....

Day 3, Tuesday - Had brunch at the foodcourt. Korean food...it actually sucked. Walked around the city again and headed towards Chinatown. Nothing spectacular, though SF's chinatown is supposed to be the biggest one in the U.S. However, it seems to be much cleaner as compared with other chinatowns we visited previously. Walked a distance to Coit Towers, to the crookedest street, and thereafter....ALL the WAY to the Golden Gate Bridge. It was a long, long walk but definitely worth it!

Yosemite National Park
Day 4, Wednesday - Took the bus to the railway station, and the train to Merced to catch the bus to the Yosemite National Park. The journey took about 7-8 hours and by the time we reached the national park, it was almost 2.30pm. Checked in to the Curry Camp. Saw a notice pasted on the door of the check-in counter a curry camp. Apparently, and Indian man was lost at the Merced River on 19th May... Wondering if he would ever be found...A pretty boring day, walked around the National Park and viewing Half Dome from far. Had dinner at one of the food courts. Used shared bathroom and it was about 5 minutes walk from our tent. We also kept our food and other stuff with a strong smell in an allocated locker which was near the nearest washrooms. This is to prevent bears, which are extremely sensitive to the smell of food, to 'crash' our tents and eat the food. If it really happens, the camper will have to pay something like US$120 and guess what? The bear will be euthanized.

Day 5, Thursday - Tried hiking the Mirror Lake track but unsuccessful. Managed to get out of the 'lost track' by 11am. Headed towards the Nevada and Vernal Falls. The 4 Australians we met said they took 7-8 hours to complete the hike of both falls, but they took a lot of breaks in between. However, we took 4 hours to complete the hike, but was entirely exhausted after the hike. Was so exhausted that I could not even speak a word.... Total distance covered was about 7 miles or more, I think.

Day 6, Friday - Took the bus down to Merced City. The South African driver was really nice and as we were at the airport real early, we walked to the city which is about 4 miles away from the airport. The driver happened to be driving pass us (in his own car) on our way to the city. He dropped us near the Starbucks in the city and we hanged out in the city till 3pm before walking back to the airport to catch the 430pm flight to Vegas.

Day 6, Friday - Reached Vegas at about 615pm. The flight was extremely bumpy and made me feel like puking. Took the airport bus to the Imperial Palace and had pizza for dinner. Was not impressed with Vegas though there's so much neon lights and big hotels with casinos all around us.

Day 7, Saturday - Had breakfast at McDonalds. Took the bus to Premium Outlet Centers. Shopped almost the whole day before we settled down to have japanese buffet for dinner.

Day 8, Sunday - Took the bus towards North to the Outlet Center, Vegas. All outlets are housed in a building unlike the premium outlets where individual stores are housed individually.

Day 9, Monday - Flight back to SF.

Day 10, Wednesday @ 1.00am - Home Sweet Home!